A Week of Truths

Over the weekend I made a decision. I've not been living a lie, no, but I have been just "going along to get along" and that's not working. This week I have a couple of thing planned.

As for the first, I'm going to be writing my mother a long and involved letter, where I explain to her the reasons why I think we don't get along. Why not just talk to her? I hear you asking - well, I've tried, and she doesn't listen, refuses to understand and ends up just yelling at me. Therefore, I figure if I write a letter to her, she can never say, "I didn't know" because I will retain a copy - I have proof - that I've tried to tell her how I feel and she either didn't read it or read it and quickly (and purposefully) forgot. I give it six months after I write the letter, and if her behavior does not change, I will seriously look for somewhere else to live, preferably on the other side of the country.

The second I've already done. I wrote a long and involved email to the Don outlining everything that I have a problem with in guild. These are things that I've tried to express in the past in conversations and feel like I've not been listened to or understood about, and this is the last time I'm going to send this information out. Either it sinks in this time or I'm finished (and no, that's not just me bing pissed off - I'm making an effort to change things).

I've already picked up some things to make the transition from one hobby to the other a smooth one - I spent $120 over the weekend on scrapbooking materials, and I tried doing it yesterday afternoon and found that I'm actually pretty good at it. I can see this becoming my new obsession, and having a lot of fun with it. I need an escape that's just me and doesn't rely on someone else's approval or cooperation to get done or for me to be proud of.

All that remains is to see if the truth, does, in fact, hurt.